Laundry Room: Evening

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty is currently arguing with an inanimate object.

He's not winning.

"I've given you quarters! I've cleaned the lint trap! Now give me my socks damn it!"

*struggles with door*

"That's it. I'm getting my cricket bat."

Comments

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia didn't have any clothes in the laundry machines, thanks to her continued habit of handwashing most of her stuff after living in the streets.

But she'd spent all day having to sing at her own door to get it to open.

And she has friends who's clothing is being held ransom.

And she has this inexplicable urge to hit things.

So she goes after the laundry machines.

On strike, her butt.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty is rattling the door to the dryer. "Give it up! Give it up!"

[nadiathesaint]

. . .

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty looked over at Nadia. "That tube guy wasn't kidding."

[nadiathesaint]

"So I hear. They're holding Pip's pants ransom." Nadia stepped over to the nearest machine, weilding her mallet. "Wanna help me fix that?"

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"Go for it. I'll be right back with my cricket bat," Marty said heading upstairs. "Persuade it all you like."

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia saluted with her mallet. "All right, machine. Let's 'negotiate'."

[nadiathesaint]

. . .

[nadiathesaint]

"So that's how you want to play it, huh?" She hefted the mallet, raising it high. "You know, that door of yours is looking mighty fragile,"

The machine's door opens. Out flies a pair of boxers.

They hit her in the face.

*sigh*

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty comes back with his cricket bat in time to see the boxer incident. "This machines mean business," he said seriously.

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia pulled the boxers off her face. "Those had better be clean."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"You think the dryer is playing dirty?" Marty asks thwapping the cricket bat in his hand in a threatening manner.

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia did not wince at the pun. She was too busy glaring.

"Guess we'll just have to play dirty right back."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty walks up to the dryer and taps the bat against the top of it. "You think you're tough? Think you're sooooo bad for throwing underwear at us? I'll have you know this is a laundry room. Not a Spinal Tap concert. Now give me my clothes or face the consequences!"

[nadiathesaint]

The laundry machine spits quarters at Marty.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty holds up his hand to deflect the stream of quarters from bouncing off his head.

It's not working.

He's getting pushed back by the force. "Nadia! Take it down while it's distracted with me!"

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia was already jumping forward, mallet at ready.

The machine opened again, and a swarm of balled up socks smacked into her.

None of them matched.

Now, that was just wrong.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty dove behind the counter to avoid the pelting of the quarters. "Retreat! Retreat! "

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia dove back as well, staring at the belligerent machine.

Which stopped as soon as they were out of the way.

"I think we need a new plan."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty brushed a couple of quarters from his lap. "Right. I think we need something to attack it from a distance."

[nadiathesaint]

"Right." Nadia looked at her mallet, then at Marty, then the machine. "Because we have so many distance weapons."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"I could throw you at it," Marty quipped. "I'm just putting that out there for ideas."

[nadiathesaint]

"Maybe I should throw you." Nadia peered over the counter at the machines.

"It's just sitting there. Waiting." She tilted her head. "Maybe we can sneak up on it?"

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"Good idea. You go sneak," Marty said. "I'll provide a distraction."

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia tucked her mallet into her waistband and edged the corner of the counter. "Distract away."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty jumped on the table and start screaming obscenities to the dryer.

He's quite good at it.

There might be some gestures that should be noted in a public forum.

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia darted out from behind the counter and, keeping low, headed straight for the drier, while it was . . . looking at Marty?

Her plan sucked.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty was now hooting and hopping around on the table and shouting obscene things about the dryer's heating element.

[nadiathesaint]

A few more laundry machines opened up and fired tshirts and socks at Marty.

[nadiathesaint]

Okay, maybe this would work. Nadia crawled over to the back of the bank of machines, spotting the power chord.

Score!

She reached out and grabbed the chord, intent on yanking it out.

BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!

She went flying back across the room and landed on her back.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

The shirts wrap around Marty's head blinding him and he falls off the table on his head.

"Not funny!"

[nadiathesaint]

. . .

*mechanical smirk*

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Marty throws a bottle of bleach at the dryer. "Take that you inferior machine with a small load capacity!"

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia sat up. Her hair was sticking out at every angle.

"You tell it."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"Your lint trap is ineffective and your wrinkle free setting is misleading!" Marty said jumping down and running towards the dryer, the bat held high up for a bashing swing.

[nadiathesaint]

Lint traps ineffective, huh?

We'll see about that.

All the machines simultaneously open their lint traps and fling their excess lint straight at Marty's face.

There's probably bits of other things, like coins and lighters and pens and such, mixed up in there as well.

These kids never empty their pockets.

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

"Ow! Damn it! Run! Run!" Marty said flailing his arms around. "It's lint! It's lint!"

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia's eyes went wide at the clumps of lint flying through the air.

At Marty. Not at her. She gritted her teeth and dashed forward, mallet raised, a wordless Amazon war cry on her lips.

The machine nearest her clicked, swung its door open, and suddenly she was on the floor again, a large pile of laundry on her head.

"I think maybe we should leave this up to the administration."

[oatmanspatient.livejournal.com]

Two of the washers begin spraying Marty with fabric softener.

"Gah! It's Downy! Run! Run!" Marty said taking off for the door.

[nadiathesaint]

Nadia shoves clothing off her face, and recognizes one piece, which she grabs as she jumps up and dashes after him.

[nadiathesaint]

The laundry room once again fell silent. The floor was now covered in clothing, quarters, lint, and fabric softener.

The silence is broken briefly by a cold, mechanical chuckle.