[East Attic -- locked to Belthazor and Phoebe and any roommates who might show up]

[demonbelthazor]

Phoebe was back. And she'd agreed to see him. Belthazor shimmered upstairs to the East Attic, appearing outside the door. His heart was racing. He didn't know why he was doing this. He'd decided his necessary course of action last night -- get rid of the soul, and the pain and confusion would all stop. No more human weakness to hinder him. But still she called to him like a Siren. He had to see her or he'd go crazy. But what the hell was he going to say?

He took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

Comments

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe stood up and took a deep breath. She couldn't believe that she was doing this. She walked over to the door and opened it slowly.

"Belthazor."

[demonbelthazor]

He flinched a little at the coldness in her tone. "Um, hi," he said lamely. "Can I come in?"

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe looked into his face and felt parts of her break away inside her. She moved to the side, holding the door open.

"Sure, come on in. Make yourself mostly comfortable."

[demonbelthazor]

He stepped into the room and waited for her to close the door before he spoke. "How...how are you?"

The look on her face was killing him.

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe closed the door and then leaned against it. She tried not to look at him, but the pain was just too real this time. She lifted her face and looked at him.

"Why?" she whispered brokenly.

[demonbelthazor]

He reached out to touch her face, then drew it back quickly. "Would you believe me if I said I was sorry?" he said.

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe took a step back and ran a hand over her eyes.

"Should I? You told me you loved me...and...I felt you...and then you...WHY?!" Tears were in her eyes. "If you were just using me for a cheap fuck, you could have just said so."

[demonbelthazor]

"It wasn't that." He looked away from her, unable to meet her gaze. "You wouldn't understand."

[sensethevisions]

"How do you know what I would and wouldn't understand, Belthazor?"

Belthazor, not Cole. Cole said he loved her.

Tears were threatening to spill from her eyes as she advanced on him.

"I thought you cared about me. You said you loved me. I felt you in my head, damn it." Phoebe was shaking as she moved closer to him.

"What was it, Belthazor? You could have just told me that since you had gotten what you wanted, you were done with me."

[demonbelthazor]

"I...did. I do." The admission just slipped out, and he took a step back as she advanced. "You just have no idea who I am...what I am."

He cocked his head and gave her a strange look. "Were you just with someone?"

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe threw her hands up in the air.

"Not really. Apparently I'm some sort of pariah. I'm good enough to fuck, but no one wants me!" Phoebe dropped onto the bed. "I tried to get someone I cared about...because I can't stop thinking about you...but he shot me down!" Phoebe covered her face with her hands.

"I thought you loved me...like I love you."

Phoebe shook her head, despair in her eyes and in her voice. "I tried to do to you...like I found you, but I couldn't. Then, I tried to get someone I cared about to want me, but he doesn't." She swallowed. "I can't gt you out of my head or my heart." Her voice dropped. "I wonder if I could get a job at the Apple?"

It was obvious that Phoebe was crushed and not thinking straight.

[demonbelthazor]

The pain her words caused him surprised him. It shouldn't be unexpected that she'd jump into bed with another man -- hell, he deserved it -- but the thought of it was devastating. He stared at her for a long moment, almost unable to breathe, trying to wash the image from his mind. He'd never felt that kind of pain before, or the jealousy that accompanied it. Phoebe and another man. It made him sick.

[sensethevisions]

"I'm in love with you and nothing makes it stop. The pain just stays there. I wanted to hurt you like you hurt me, but I couldn't go through with it." Phoebe tries to take a breath. "When you told me you loved me, it made me the happiest girl in the world." She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face. "What I don't understand is why you said those words at all? You had already been given my virginity. I was already sleeping with you. Why lie about something like that?"

[demonbelthazor]

"I...wasn't lying," he said in a pained voice, still reeling. This wasn't going how he planned. He had hoped he could steel himself against her and...be cruel, or something...get her out of his system. But it was just the opposite. Her tears were killing him and he wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and make them stop.

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe looked at him. "Then tell me why, Belthazor. why did you do that to me if you really loved me?"

[demonbelthazor]

"Because you're better off without me!" he snapped. "I can't...you don't know what I am."

He smiled humourlessly. "But you will soon enough. Your friends on the 'Hottest Ticket' have seen to that. Cute little attack there. And I'm not even really running. My name just somehow ended up on the ticket."

[sensethevisions]

Phoebe throws a pillow at his head.

"I am so sick and tired of people telling me who I'd be better off with or without."

She throws another pillow.

"So they found out you're not human, big fucking deal! Very few people here are human."


((OOC: no, Pheebs hasn't seen all of the tape yet. She's just assuming that Cole is a vampire because he's so close to Angelus.))

[demonbelthazor]

He ducked the pillows, looking at her in surprise. She'd seen what he really was and still she said she loved him? "You...saw what I really look like already?" he said slowly. "You know I'm a demon?"


[Ha! I can see that. But he's going to assume she's seen the tape now. ;) Since this is before your drunken binge we may want to talk how this is going to finish before you react to anything they might tell you because you might already know.]

[sensethevisions]

"You'd have to be to spend so much time with Angelus!" she muttered. "Maybe I'm one, too. Ever think about that?"

Phoebe sank back down on her bed.

[demonbelthazor]

"I already know what you are," he said. "You're a witch. And so is your sister. And your other sister is half a witch, half a whitelighter. Your kind and mine...aren't supposed to be together."

[sensethevisions]

"Why not? Who gets to dictate any of that?"

[demonbelthazor]

"People who will kill both of us," he said. "And your sisters. I'm supposed to report you, but...."

[sensethevisions]

"But what?" Phoebe asked softly, tears sliding down her cheeeks. "Love is supposed to conquer all."

[demonbelthazor]

"You've seen what I look like...can you love that?" he said. Her tears were bringing fresh pain to his heart. He should leave, walk away from her, stop this madness...but he couldn't bring himself to do it.

[sensethevisions]

"You're still you."