Room 234: *headbanging* [Parker, Broots, but open after that]

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

Okay, Parker's not actually head-banging, but she is dancing. She's in a fantastically good mood. Mostly. She's really hoping Logan stays a bunny until *after* tonight's interview, but otherwise? Good mood.

Broots is on his way up to (a) give her the email addresses she needs, plus a copy of the research they did last week, and (b) sweep her room for bugs.

Hey, it's only smart. She got lucky last night. You never know who might be listening.

She is singing to "Chicago", doing all the Catherine Zeta-Jones parts.

Comments

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"You have a strong will Parker, use it. I'm not saying you can't be pissed off. Frak, in this kind of situation, rage can be the only thing that keeps you going. But you can't show it. Bury it so deep that you can barely touch it, store it against the day when you can act on it without repercussions. Echolls wants to push your buttons, to break you, are you going to let him?"

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

Parker stares at Callisto. Then smiles nastily.

"And if he can't walk, how is that breaking *me*?" She's nearly snarling. "If I hurt him, how the hell am I losing? Detention? Expulsion?" She lets out a breath. "I almost really, really don't care, Callisto. I have more important things to worry about than this crap assignment. If I get to walk out screaming he's an asshole, I don't see how that makes me lose anything."

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"Because you'll have done exactly what he wants you to. He wants you to get angry, to blow up and fail the assignment. He wants to humiliate you in any way he can. I've seen his kind a hundred times before, petty little people who think that money gives them the right to do whatever they please. That a piece of parchment means they can break a person like they would a horse. To that kind, human lives are just game pieces."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

"You don't have to tell me that!" Parker snaps. "Why do you think I want to hurt him! Why do you think he should get away with it!" She's pacing now. "It's too late, I'm already angry, telling me not to let it get to me won't help, he knows I'm pissed, there's no taking that back--"

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"I don't think he should get away with it. He should be made to pay for it. But not now, not today. Wait until he doesn't have any power, no matter how trivial, over you. Let him think he's won. Then, when he least expects it, strike." Callisto sighs. "Parker, when it comes down to, a slave's worst enemy isn't their Master. It's themselves, that part of them that knows they are more than property, that screams for them to take their lives back, that small secret place inside that knows that death is preferable to another day living bound to another's whims. Those who don't learn when to ignore that part of themselves, don't survive."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

Parker's stomach hurts so much she thinks she's going to be sick. "I have a friend." Her voice is very quiet. "Who was in Nazi Germany." She looks up, her face drawn into harsh lines. "Do you know what that was?"

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"Thanks to the marvels of the internet, I've heard more than I ever wanted to know."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

"Most of his family died. Except for him and his brother. There were experiments--" Parker cuts herself off. "I asked him how he did it, once. How he got through it. He said as long as he had Jacob, he had a reason to keep going."

Parker lets out a long breath. "I do get this. I do. I just-- telling me I *can* is not enough, when I know I can walk away from this. In a real world-- I'd do it. I'd survive. But when I can just let it go...."

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"But that's just it, you can't just let it go. Roleplay or no, Echolls doesn't have the right to act like he is, he has to learn that treating another person as less than human has consequences, unpleasant ones. Remember you don't have to be sweetness and light to him, so long as you stay within the rules, you can pull as much godsdamn passive-aggressive bullshit as you like."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

"The rules." Parker's smile is briefly very bitter, then she nods, wincing. "Okay. I'll... I'll go with it. Some of this interview won't be a lie anyway, but... I'll try to go beyond that."

She looks up from the badge. "I'm sorry you ever went through this. Thank you for trying to help." Her voice is rather flat when she says this, but she doesn't look like she's lying.

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

Callisto shrugs "I'm a survivor, it's what I do."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

"Surviving is better, I suppose." Better than a gunshot to the head in an elevator, anyway. Better than being that kind of weak. Parker nodded. "Allright. I'll let you know how it turns out."

[psycho-barbie.livejournal.com]

"Just remember Parker, you aren't alone in this. You need to rage, scream, throw things, whatever. I'm there."

[mparkerceo.livejournal.com]

"I'll... keep it in mind." The raging headache is now just down to tension; her stomach burns but doesn't hurt. Maybe there's something to this.

Maybe.