fandomhighdorms | The picnic tables in front of the dorms: Sunday afternoon

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The picnic tables in front of the dorms: Sunday afternoon

Karal had been working in his room most of the day, but it was gorgeous outside, no sign of rain, and he was getting a bit sick of being cooped up in there, so he packed up all his papers and carried them downstairs to the picnic tables.

As it happened, they also gave him a lot more space to spread out, so that's what he did, covering one table completely.

Just in case, he made sure everything was held down with rocks so it wouldn't blow away, then settled in to writing his report to send home to Karse.

[ooc: open of course. Just FYI, he's writing in Karsite, and it looks like this.]

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He blinked at her for a moment, still stuck in what he'd been doing, then smiled. "Hello, Inara. Actually, I think an apple would be very nice."

She rummaged in her bag for a minute, then handed him a crisp-looking, shiny one. "I'm told they're grown here, which is just unbelievable. How are you?"

"Thank you." Karal accepted the apple with another smile. "And I'm well. How goes things with you?" he asked. "And why is it unbelievable that they grow apples here?"

"Things go reasonably well," she fidgeted a little, "and Shinon didn't grow its own apples--they were imported from agricultural planets, and prices were ridiculously high."

He nodded in understanding and took a careful bite of the apple. "Like in the cities," he said when he'd finished. "The farther one goes from farmland, the more expensive things grow. I cannot imagine how much more they would cost if they were brought from another planet!"

"We were allowed some fresh fruit in the training house, so we could acquire a taste for it, but it was more of a reward or treat than an everyday occurance," she explained, "but yes, the principle still holds true."

"There was often fruit at the Temple, though the best was usually gone before it came to the Novices." He smiled to show he hadn't minded and looked at her thoughtfully. "May I ask what it was like there? At the training house, I mean."

"Quiet, but not as peaceful as you'd expect. The girls were occasionally competitive in unhealthy ways," she acknowledged.

"Not unlike the Cloister, then." He rolled the apple between his hands and took another small bite, chewing it thoughtfully. "Do you miss it?"

"Occasionally, but my best friend there--Nandi--she hasn't written to me yet. I think she was jealous that I got chosen to come here and she didn't, so I'm not sure there's even anyone there to miss anymore."

"Oh," he said softly. "I'm sorry, Inara. Unfortunately, that is so often human nature." Another nibble of his apple. "But there are people here who care about you, and who would miss you if you were gone."

"Yes," she sighed, once again happy but conflicted, "that is true. I didn't expect to make permanent attachments here."

"I would miss you if you were gone," he said firmly. "So you are not allowed to leave." Karal paused, then smiled at her, just teasing a little in the hopes of making her smile, as he added, "And I suspect I'm not the only one."

"Oh, I'm not going anywhere," she said, surprised by the idea, "and no, you're not." She smiled widely and hoped that Karal wouldn't notice if it didn't reach all the way to her eyes. "Gavin managed to surprise me."

Unfortunately, it was just the sort of thing he'd been trained to notice. "I heard a little from Gavin," he said, leaning forward. "If you need someone to talk with, you know I'm here."

"It was fine when I loved him," she lowered her voice to almost a whisper and trusting him to keep her secrets, "but him loving me in return--and he does, Karal, he told me and I believed him--it makes things so complicated, and I'm just going to hurt him. I'm not supposed to have relationships. I don't know how."

He set his apple aside and folded his hands in front of him. So many things he could say, and he wanted nothing more than to reassure her, but that wouldn't actually help. "Inara?" His voice was as quiet as hers. "Why are you so certain you're going to hurt him?"

"Nothing good comes from being in love. You can lose your reputation, your standing, your future, your sense of self...sometimes your life," she'd heard whispers about some of the licensed Companions who had left. "He's just too good. He deserves someone who isn't me."

Karal was quite certain her fear went farther than hurting Gavin, and his heart hurt for her. "Those are two very different things, neither of which I'm sure explain your fear," he said gently.

His apple wasn't sitting quite so well as it had been, but he ignored the minor ache. "Love is not about deserving, as I think you know. Gavin loves you, and it is returned. Are you afraid those things are going to happen to you or to him?"

"Both," she admitted quietly, "but I'd rather hurt myself than Gavin, any day of the week."

"I believe Gavin feels the same," he said, and unfolded his hands, holding them palms up, fingers spread. "You are not yet a Companion. You are not on Shinon. You're here, in a place very different from the training house. Is there anyone here who would cause those things to happen?"

She considered that for a few minutes. "Not that I know of."

He nodded. "And you yourself said you were not going anywere?"

Another nod. "Yes, that's true." More quiet contemplation. "I have to become a Companion, Karal. Not just because it's all I know. There's another goal now, and I need to be a Companion to accomplish it."

"I can understand that, Inara. Believe me, I understand. But you are not a Companion yet." He cocked his head, studying her, wondering at the other goal, but he would't pry. "Do you believe that allowing yourself this time with Gavin will prevent you becoming one?"

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NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please

Re: NFB, please