Out front of the Sirius cabin, Friday morning

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

Gladys spent Thursday night watching the stars for signs of life and knitting.

River had taught her to knit and so had given the golem her first hobby. Possibly the first hobby any golem, anywhere, had ever had.

Of course, that hobby was knitting dildo cozies. Lots of didlo cozies. A golem was, essentially, a machine, and she had produced cozy after cozy with machine like precision.

All the yarn was gone. All that was left was a huge mound of dildo cozies.

Not knowing what to do with them, Gladys had made a sign.

Please Take A Dildo Cozy. They Are Free.

And no, she still didn't know what a dildo was.

[ooc: Help yourself to a moddably coloured and sized dildo cozy!]

Comments

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

Inara was out for a morning walk and stopped in front of the table. Because really, how could she not? "Oh, my."

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"Good Morning. Would You Like A Dildo Cozy? There Are A Great Many Of Them."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

"I see that," she said, fingering the nearest cozy. "Did you make them? You've managed to achieve quite a variety."

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"Yes. River Showed Me How To Make Them And Now I Have A Hobby. I Made These Last Night But I Do Not Know What To Do With Them," she explained. "I Thought That People Might Find Them Useful."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

"That's, ah, very considerate of you." It was, but there were many, many cozies. "And of River. Did she happen to, um, mention what they're for?"

Please say no.

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"Yes. They Are Used To Keep Recreational Toys At A Comfortable Temperature."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

Her eyes widened. "Okay, then." Inara thought she was developing a headache. "Did she also explain that other things can be made using the same technique? Hats, sweaters, socks..."

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"She Did Not. I Know Knitting Is Useful For Many Things But She Only Showed Me How To Make These." She pointed at the pile. "So Those Were What I Made. Are There Enough Recreational Toys To Need This Many Cozies?"

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

Yes, definitely a headache. "I don't know how many students there are, or if every student has a recreational toy, but there is definitely an ample supply. Perhaps..." She blinked as she realized one of the cozies was purple and sparkly, with gold threads interwoven. "Perhaps someone will have an alternate use for them, as well?"

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

Gladys' eyes flickered as she considered this. "I Would Like Them to Be Useful, Even If It Is For A Different Use Than I Made Them. They Should Not Go To Waste," she said slowly. "But I Do Not Know What Else They Could Be Good For."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

Inara considered. "Hairbrush holders? Hats for people with very long heads? Cat tail warmers?"

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

She looked at the pile of dildo cozies. She looked at Inara. "Those Are Good Ideas. Maybe I Should Offer Them As Not Just For Dildos, But As Being Good For Many Uses."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

"I think that would be a very wise idea," she agreed. Then realized she didn't know the creature/woman/girl/man/boy's name. "I'm Inara. It's nice to meet you."

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"My Name Is Gladys. Thank You For Helping Me. Would You Like To Take A Dildo Cozy? They Are Good For Many Things." And that just might be Gladys' first ever attempt at humour.

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

"You're welcome, and thank you, I will." She paused, then smiled at Gladys, appreciating the slight joke. "Would you mind if I took several? I'd like to give them out to my friends."

Who might kill her, but it would be funny until then.

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"You Can Have As Many As You Want," she replied. "If There Are Not Enough, I Can Easily Make More."

[ambassadorinara.livejournal.com]

"Oh, no, that won't be necessary," she said quickly, making sure to pick a particularly garish one for Gavin, and one for Karal, and Jaina...maybe Kaylee as well. "But thank you for the thought."

[cheminthehead.livejournal.com]

"You Are Welcome."