fandomhighdorms | Fifth Floor Common Room; Tuesday Morning [ 02/03 ].

Sokka wandered in, grabbed an untoasted Pop Tart out of the box, and flopped down on the couch. "I resent being called a pervert, you know," he told her. "Just because you don't like girlkissy doesn't mean you have to insult the people who do."

Turtle looked up from her book with both eyebrows raised about as high as they could go.

"I don't remember asking you what you thought about it," she stated, "but if you don't want people calling you things like that, maybe you shouldn't do things that might be interpreted as perverted. Seriously. Videotaping girls kissing for your own amusement. That's perverseness. Just because I don't like it doesn't mean I'm not entitled to voice my opinion on it. If you don't want to be called a pervert, don't do perverted things."

Sokka shrugged. "So what if it's perverted and exploitative? Most of the girls there didn't mind being taped, so I'm going to pretend like that justifies it. I don't like that you made a big deal out of it on the radio, and I'm really disappointed that you didn't join in."

He frowned and tried to puzzle out exactly why he'd just said all that.

"Ew!" It came out of Turtle before she could help it, her face filling with red because she knew that 'ew' did not make a very good point in a debate.

But it wasn't helped by the fact that it continued with, "I don't want you thinking about stuff like that, Sokka, even though I'm glad to hear that you think it would be hot to see me kiss other girls."

WHAT?

"I have a boyfriend! And it's not that I have a problem with kissing girls, Sokka, it isn't! I've kissed Hoshi, and I liked it, so clearly, that's not the issue!"

That was also not something she would typically consider a point she'd want to make in an argument, either, so Turtle boggled a moment as to why she actually had allowed it.

"I mean, I can't help it that, when I kiss someone, I want it to mean something special, can I? I hate how the whole school practically makes me feel like a prude just because I want my kisses to mean something more than, 'el-oh-el, it's hot and boys will like me better if I do it!' Because, let me tell you, there are a lot of people here I wouldn't mind kissing, yourself included, but I'm not going to just reduce myself to that level where it doesn't mean anything but a quick thrill."

...WHAT in God's name just came out of her mouth?

Edited 2009-02-03 16:59 (UTC)

Sokka chuckled. "You're just saying whatever you're thinking, aren't you?" he asked, with a smirk. "HA! NOOOOOO filter at all!!! And if I point and laugh at you enough, I can ignore how terrified I am that it might happen to me, too!"

He frowned. Oooookay, let's just ignore that and press onward. "And I think kissing should be special, too! I'm not, like, Chuck Bass or anything! But people around here seem to think it doesn't mean anything, and kissing, and being kissed, and WATCHING kissing all feel good enough that I try to ignore the part of me that feels weird about it!"

That... wasn't exactly the argument he meant to make.

"And I'm just going to shut up now, because the NEXT thing I was going to say was that I'm glad to hear that you'd want to kiss me, because I've got a bit of a crush on you and my enormous ego is just a cover for how cripplingly inadequate I feel deep inside, and BOY, I really don't want to say THAT out loud!"

And Turtle? Turtle just stared for a moment; she glanced toward her breakfast as if briefly considering that it was something she ate that caused all this, but that didn't make any logical sense so she just started to gape.

The only problem with gaping was that it left a perfect opportunity for more words to just come out on their own.

"We can't have crushes on each other, Sokka!" she informed him, although not intentionally, "no matter how much I like you and think you're incredibly cute, because we both have significant others, and, besides it would be inappropriate workplace conduct, since I'm your boss! And that's part of the reason I even hired you in the first place, so that I could tell myself that it was clearly not meant to be because you're an employee and that's wrong. I didn't work very well, because I still like you, but that does--"

With a great effort, she put both her hands to her mouth to stop her talking; she mumbled a little before it ceased, and then kept them firmly there, staring at Sokka with wide, petrified eyes.

Sokka... Had no idea what was going on. None.

"It's not like it has to CHANGE anything!" Sokka insisted. "I mean, you're better off with Jeff anyway, and I love Mel so much it scares me, and besides, she's hotter than you, so it's probably best if we both shut up and pretend this whole conversation never happened!"

"Well, Jeff has better hair that you," Turtle said, bristling just slightly under the hot comment, "and you're too skinny, anyway. But you're absolutely right and we should just pretend that none of this ever happened, although forgetting that it happened would be pretty much impossible. Pretending I can do. I'm good at pretending a ton of stuff."

Sokka looked down at his arms, pinching them and frowning. Too skinny?

"AbsoLUTEly!" he agreed. "And I'm good at all KINDS of things, including pretending! ...But not actually as good at as many things as I normally claim to be."

To that, Turtle snorted, a bit of a nervous snort, because she wanted to just stop this conversation, but it just kept going. "Tell me something I didn't already assume," she said. "I know I'm not pretending on a lot of what I claim, but, some of it, yeah, I am. A lot. I wish I could be tougher. And prettier. And had bigger b--had control over what I'm saying, what the hell?"

"Bah!" Sokka waved a hand dismissively. "You just don't have enough self-confidence. The things you're good at, you're really good at." He couldn't stop his mouth, and he sort of gave up trying and let the words flow with a bit of an apologetic look in his eyes. "I wish you could be tougher, too, but you're PLENTY pretty. And sure, not everyone can have Mel's boobs" -- he sighed happily -- "but yours are nice. Cute and perky, like Rikku's."

Turtle just let out a miserable groan because it just wouldn't stop, would it? Her face was red and hiding in her arms, which had folded on the table as if to create a nice little hole to crawl into. "I can't even stop myself," she said, with firm resolution, though it was muffled by the burying, "from mentioning that, hey, at least you've noticed them. Ugh! I'm plenty self-confidence. I've got confidence in spades, so long as it has to do with business or politics or law. It's just stupid looks, and stupid looks count more for most people. Just look at my sister! She's freaking gorgeous, and so everyone loves her and Turtle just gets put in the closet!"

There was a sharp intake of breath. "This is getting super annoying. This is almost making me want to cry."

Thankfully, she was too angry at the word vomit to actually do it.

"It's stupid. Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid..."

It went on, each repetition accompanied with a slight knock of her head on the table. It helped, though. If she just kept saying the same word over and over, she'd stop being so nauseatingly honest.

"Uhh... Don't hurt yourself! I'd feel awful if I made you hurt yourself. And you're not stupid at all; you're one of the smartest people I know."

Sokka got up off the couch, but he wasn't sure whether to walk over to her or not. "Looks only count for anything if you want something pretty to stare at. And I SERIOUSLY doubt that your sister can be anywhere near as awesome as you. Because you are. And if people are putting you in the closet... well, whatever kinky things you and Jeff do in your free time, I don't want to know about. Except I kinda do."

"I didn't say I was stupid, Sokka," Turtle muttered, but she stopped banging her head. "I said it was stupid. This whole...talking thing. I know I'm not stupid. And, no that's not a weird kinky thing, Sokka, gross. That's a reference to my mom giving me a closet for a bedroom because she hates me. There's nothing even sexual about that. The only thing sexual about closets is that fact that when I first tried to have sex with Jeff, he spent the whole night locked in a closet from distress."

It was followed by a pause, and then a slow groan, because she did not mean to tell anyone about that ever, much less Sokka.

"I KNOW it wasn't a weird kinky thing," Sokka clarified. "It was just supposed to be a joke -- apparently those still work okay. Your bedroom, though... that really sucks. Of course, now that you're a successful entrepreneur, you don't ever have to deal with THAT again."

Sokka sighed and shook his head. "And you really don't need to be ashamed of the Jeff thing. Of COURSE the guy freaked out -- he's got all KINDS of bizarre issues, most of them involving breasts. What you OUGHT to do is just lock yourselves in, strip naked, and have sex for a couple of days straight until he gets desensitized."

"Oh, we've done that, too," Turtle said, her tone dismissive, and her expression matching the tone for a brief second. For the exact amount of time it took for one to realize what it was that actually just said. And then she went so deep into blushing that her face was actually white instead, eyes rounded.

"Well, I mean, not for a couple days straight through! You'd have to be a machine to do that. But there's been a few...times...when Fandom gets too wei--"

"WHY AM I TELLING YOU THIS? You don't need to know this! You don't want to know this!"

"...Do you?"

"Well, sure, it's disturbing, and awfully weird to think about, but yeah, I do, because I'm a pervert."

Sokka looked around helplessly. "And now, I would like to find a piece of duct tape to put over my mouth. And a digital voice recorder."

"But this whole thing started with you trying to say you weren't a pervert!" Turtle said in desperation. "And I'm sure not even duct tape would help. I bet if you duct taped your mouth, you'd wind up writing things instead. It's EVIL."

"I said I didn't want to be CALLED a pervert," Sokka corrected her. "Because I'm ashamed that I am one. "And you're probably right about the duct tape. It's a shame. I'd shut myself in my room all day, but then I wouldn't be able to hear everybody else talking. Besides, I'd probably end up telling Rodney how jealous I am of him for being so much smarter than me, and who wants THAT?"

"If you're so ashamed, then how come you're doing perverted things?" Turtle couldn't help asking. "So, clearly, Rodney is smarter, because he's smart enough to not get caught doing perverted things when someone who'll call you out on it is doing radio that night."

"Because as ashamed as I am, I enjoy it too much to stop," Sokka pointed out. "And Rodney's, like, the smartest person in the WORLD. Why do you think I make fun of him so much?"

He bit his lip in thought and looked Turtle right in the eyes. "If you're doing radio, you can report that we had a nice, pleasant chat about nothing embarrassing at ALL. Capisce? ...Except you can't, can you, because of the weirdness going on. Crap. ...Did you know you have pretty eyes?"

Turtle was about to say something to the tune of reminding Sokka that she didn't have radio tonight, Emmett did, but that last part completely derailed her.

"I do?" she asked. "You do too! I mean! I mean, not pretty, obviously, because you're a guy, but they're very nice!"

There was the slightest of pauses.

"You really think they're pretty?"

"REALLY pretty," Sokka answered. "Almost as pretty as Mel's."

Turtle wrinkled her nose at the qualification, but she couldn't help admitting, "I guess that's not too bad, then..."

"Well, I am biased," Sokka admitted.

"Yeah, I guess," Turtle allowed, content in the fact that if there wasn't Mel, she might be in line for the better eyes. See? This was getting a little easier. "I still think that me liking Jeff's hair a lot more is not just a bias. You can't run your fingers as easily through a ponytail."

"Okay, look," Sokka told her honestly, "I know it's technically a ponytail, but it's shorter, and higher up, and only the hair on the TOP of my head is gathered up. That really DOES make a difference, in my culture. And besides, Jeff has cute, fluffy hair. Who wouldn't want to run their fingers through it?"

"Yeah...." The ponytail was entirely forgotten for a moment with a small, dreamy smile. "It really is. And it smells nice, too. When he remembers to wash it."

"He doesn't WASH it?!??" Sokka asked, horrified. Then he groaned. "Oh, listen to me, I've gone SOFT. It used to be, I'd spend days at a time hunting out in the snow with a bunch of other men, never washing, wearing the same wet leather day in and day out, and not care about the smell!"

"He's a boy," Turtle said, "a boy could probably wash his hair every day and it still wouldn't seem enough for a girl. But I think that's how he manages to get it kind of curly like that, letting it go for a day or so. And that's kind of hot, too. Rugged."

"I could rugged him up for you, if you wanted," Sokka offered. "Take him out into the preserve for a few days, teach him to live off the land, kill his own food, that sort of thing." Sokka tried to imagine Jeff doing any of that. "...Or maybe just teach him to fish."

"I wish I could take you up on that offer," Turtle said with a faint sigh, "but I'm too worried that if Jeff wound up in the preserve for more than a few hours, he wouldn't come back for at least a month. He has a tendency to do that."

"I wouldn't let him get lost," Sokka told her. "At least, I'd try my hardest to make sure he didn't. I could tie myself to him with a rope, if that would help."

"I'm sure Karal never intended to get him lost, either," Turtle said, "but that didn't stop it from happening. Sometimes, this place is just stronger than all of our best efforts combined."

"Right, no preserve, then," Sokka replied. "This place is stronger than the SPIRITS. Still, if he ever wants lessons in manliness... Well, okay, maybe not that, but RUGGEDNESS I can do."

"I'll keep that in mind," Turtle muttered, "but I doubt I'll actually take you up on it."

Fifth Floor Common Room; Tuesday Morning [ 02/03 ].

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