3rd Floor Common Room - Late Saturday Morning

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck...didn't cook breakfast. Or couldn't, rather. He could make cereal, yes, and he was fairly sure toast was within his capabilities but anything involving a the stove or a microwave for an extended period of time was out of the question. The stove because he'd most likely catch whatever he was attempting to make on fire. The microwave because, ew, who the hell ate stuff that came out of a microwave? It was disgusting.

Oh, save for popcorn. And bagel bites.

He wasn't much in the mood for cereal this morning so he was sitting on the kitchen counter, peeling an orange (yes, he could do that without messing up) and watching the TV from afar, hoping he could push someone into cooking for him. He'd like pancakes, thank you. Preferably ones with chocolate chips in them.

[Common room is open, of course]

Comments

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

"You mean George Hamilton. He's the tan guy. Alexander Hamilton was secretary of something or other," Chuck said. "You got them mixed up. Unless you meant to compare me to a ten dollar bill or something."

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Man, whatever. Same difference," Emmett said with a wave of his hand. "Point is, we're both pale. And that's not my point."

Right.

"You've got a lot of porn, right?"

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Well this conversation took an uncomfortable and creepy turn pretty quickly.

"I suppose I'm a connoisseur of sorts," Chuck confirmed.

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Gay porn?" Emmett asked. "Like, guy on guy stuff?"

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck was reminded of what he overheard last week and suddenly Emmett's voice was sounding familiar. And just when he thought this couldn't get any creepier.

Still, Emmett was huge and Chuck wasn't about to tick him off by leaving.

"I've got all sorts. Gay stuff included," Chuck said. "...why? You want some? I thought you were whipped."

Maybe the girl didn't exist. Poor Emmett.

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"What? No, dude, totally taken," he said. And not whipped, thank you. "It's for a friend."

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck smirked. "Sure it is."

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Man, fuck you. It is for a friend," Emmett insisted. "A certain British friend whose ears are slightly bigger than average."

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

There may have been a visible shudder at the mention of the ears.

"Ugh, yes, I know who you're talking about," Chuck said. "Why can't he just ask me himself? I'm a friendly guy."

Sure you are, Chuck.

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, friendliest guy I know," Emmett said with a roll of his eyes. "He doesn't know he needs it. I'm trying to help him out."

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

"Call me crazy but I seem to recall you doing something like this to him before. Ending with some less-than-stellar, yet hilarious, results," Chuck said. "What makes you think he'll fall for it again?"

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Because he's Ears and practically lives to fall for that kind of stuff," Emmett said. God bless him and his naivety. "And I figure if you give it to him instead of me he'd be more likely to watch."

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

"And why does it have to be gay porn again?"

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Because I like fucking with him?" Emmett tried.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck snickered. "Ah, my favorite reason for doing evil. Okay, Cullen, I'll help you out, free of charge."

[mauledbyabear.livejournal.com]

"Pleasure doing business with you, Bass," Emmett said, holding out his hand.

[rocksthescarf.livejournal.com]

Chuck shook Emmett's hand even though he knew it was going to be a fucking cold grip. "Likewise, Cullen."

Nothing like plotting evil on a Saturday morning.