The Roof, Friday Morning

[endsthegame]

It had happened as it had happened the last time: overnight, while Ender was still awake, bundled up in blankets on the roof with his laptop in front of him, working. His position shifted slightly, his center of gravity dropped, his arms grew shorter and his waist grew thinner.

He was a girl again. A slightly more matured girl - for women did reach puberty quicker than men - than he'd been the last time this had happened, but still fundamentally a girl.

His mouth twisted into a slight grimace because of the coming discomfort of his body, but it felt altogether natural anyway. He kept on working. This was hardly going to distract him, although it might shift his point of view slightly.

That was welcome, too.

[[ open! ]]

Comments

[glacial_queen]

Karla was up early for a change. If anyone asked if she was checking to make sure the sun was coming up as it should, she'd deny such an assertion vehemently.

...Which was probably why it was good that the likelihood of such a question coming up were nil.

She absently nodded to the other female on the roof, mentally filing her under 'people I haven't met yet.' Until she got close enough to catch wind of her psychic scent.

"Ender?!"

Wait--no, it felt like Ender, but not entirely.

"Ender?" This was a it more tentative.

Though that change could be easily explained by 'omg--female!'

"Seriously?!"

[endsthegame]

That was enough to startle just about anyone.

Ender looked up. "Karla," he said, with just a hint of surprise.

[glacial_queen]

Karla was...boggled. Flummoxed. Shocked. Surprised. Bloody well confused.

"You can't be a female. You just can't!" Karla was stubbornly clinging to the idea that she was insane. That wads actually more comforting. "I'm not seeing this. Nope. No way. I CAN HANDLE SUNS THAT DON'T RISE FOR THE BLOOD BUT THIS IS JUST BEYOND THE PALE!!!"

Karla wasn't adjusting well.

[endsthegame]

No, that much was evident.

"Karla," Ender repeated, more sure now that he was certain it was her, "Sit down."

That was command voice, right there.

[glacial_queen]

Karla didn't sit so much as 'dropped in a heap that conveniently landed bottom first.' Having someone tell her what to do was nice since it freed up her mind to focus completely on utterly denying what she was seeing. "No, no, no, no, no," she informed him. As if explaining rationally that this was not possible would change things back. "No."

[endsthegame]

This was shock. Considering the way gender lined up in her world, Ender supposed he shouldn't really be surprised. "Karla," he said, because repeating her name seemed like a decent way to anchor her, at least. "It's a Fandom thing. It'll be back to normal by this time tomorrow, if it's anything like last time."

[glacial_queen]

"You cannot be a girl," she explained. "That's not how this works. Males are males and females are females. That's how it works. Are you suddenly going to be a Queen now? Or a Healer? Just because you're a female? No!"

That argument wouldn't have made sense even if Ender were Blood. Now it was just a kind of gibberish.

On the other hand, it was coherently spoken gibberish. Some credit was deserved here.

[endsthegame]

And credit was given.

"I am a girl," he said, slowly, but not because he thought she was slow. "For the day. Not a Healer, not a Queen, just the same psychological imperative with a different physiological shell."

[glacial_queen]

"But you can't!" Karla wailed. "It just...isn't right!"

She possibly would have tried to explain what 'it' was and why it wasn't right, but she burst into tears instead.

Karla had been through an awful lot lately and apparently gender-swapping was just enough to push her over the edge.

[endsthegame]

He weighed the strain of reminding her of the change against the need for some physical intimacy; of course, when Ender had reached his conclusion, his arm had already reached to find her shoulders.

He found that was happening an awful lot with people lately - if he'd been interested in comparing his mental state, the last time this had happened, he'd been a fair deal more maudlin.

"I'm Ender," he said. "Everything else about me is negligible. Up to and including my silly haircut."

[glacial_queen]

"Y-you're very pretty," Karla sniffled, leaning into his (her? ahhh!) arm a bit. "And it's a better h-haircut than Ben's."

"Even your psychic scent it w-wrong," she told Ender, hiccuping. "If this happened in Kaeleer, I don't even know what would happen. Anarchy, maybe."


[Must to bed. Will pick up tomorrow.]

[endsthegame]

"At least Ben dropped the braid, although that didn't help his face much," he said, letting the banter fall with as much calming energy as he could. "So feel lucky we're not in Kaeleer. It won't last long."

[[ night! ]]

[glacial_queen]

"He had a very nice face," Karla said miserably. "You both do. I like your faces. As males."

Though girl!Ender really was pretty.

"How are you not fazed by this?" she complained. "Does nothing ever penetrate that shield of yours?"

There was a distinct lack of a brain-tongue filter right now, yes.

[endsthegame]

She should have seen him on the day they were all forced to speak the truth - or not seen him, as he'd hidden as far as he could. "I've had this happen to me before," Ender reminded her, letting his arm give whatever comfort it could. "Besides, the best way to dealing with change is to orient yourself as best you can to the new reality. Going into shock doesn't work well for me."

And had a tendency to render him serious and focused, rather than flaily and extroverted.

[glacial_queen]

He just wasn't seeing it. "Gender isn't like this. It isn't something that can be switched at random. It's not..." Karla struggled to remember what Brennan had said the day they'd covered gender in a way that made Karla's head hurt "...just cultural somethings that you can ignore or not. It means more than that! It does!"

Someone's world was rocking precariously on its foundations.

[momslilassassin]

"This is not okay," Ben griped, stomping up onto the roof and yanking at one of the long braids he'd managed to wrangle his--her?--hair into.

[endsthegame]

Ender looked up. "It'll pass," he said. "Hi."

[endsthegame]

"You should take that up with the gender dysmorphic," Ender said, watching her carefully.

[momslilassassin]

Ben tromped up a few minutes later, a distinctly unlady-like sound, regardless of the current packaging. "Hi, Karla," he said ruefully.

[momslilassassin]

"I'm short," Ben said, sitting down next to him. "And...top heavy or something."

[glacial_queen]

"Not you too!" Karla wailed.

Which might be Ben's first indication that Karla was not going to handle this well.

[endsthegame]

"And you are...?" he prompted.

Not that he had a shortlist of people who spent their time on the roof.

[glacial_queen]

"The gender what?" She probably could have figured that out by herself, but she was busy cataloging all the ways that this was wrong. And dumb. And messing with her head.

It was a long list, okay?

[momslilassassin]

Uh-oh. Unhappy girl.

Ben was very, very bad at handling unhappy girls.

"I'm sorry!" he babbled. "It's not my fault."

Excellent, Ben. Quote Uncle Han.

[endsthegame]

"Men who are born feeling they should be female," Ender said, idly. "Females who want to be male. Or want to be just a little bit male, without the surgery - or males who just want to look a little bit female."

He smiled wryly. "This era pioneered the idea that maybe gender is fluid," he said.

And one of these days you were going to wind up housing a third of your soul in a female body, and causing massive sexuality confusion in men, Ender.