Fourth Floor Common Room [evening]

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

It should have come as no surprise that as soon as Kelly figured out the year (and it took her long enough), she bounded out to the common room to plunk in front of a TV and try to take in as much pop culture as possible.

"Those pants are cute! Omigod, so cute! And that tall blonde chick who, like, poses everywhere? Is awesome. I like her dog! BRAD AND ANGELINA HAVE LIKE, SEVENTY BABIES. What happened? They both used to be like, super-hot and like, now they have a million babies, and babies are cool but like, none of those kids really look like them! That's so weird."

And so forth. No, she wasn't talking to anyone in particular.

[so, so open.]

Comments

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

Mat was still not going back to his room. Since he'd had luck on the fourth floor earlier in the day, well, he'd try it again!

And Mat was very lucky.

"Those are different tiny people in the box," he observed, walking in.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod, this Ryan Seacrest is like, beyond adorable," Kelly told him excitedly. "Look at his totally cute frosted hair!"

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

"If he's going out in the frost he should wear a bloody hat," Mat replied. "Maybe that's why he's so short."

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Like, not literal frost," she assured him. "Like, blond! See how he's like, all blondy but more blond on top? It's because, like, he's super awesome and like, cares how he looks, you know?"

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

"I care how I look," Mat replied.

Well, sort of. The blue silk jacket with silver embroidery was handmade and ridiculously expensive-looking, the breeches certainly showed his legs and rear to their full advantage, but they both look a bit like he'd slept in them.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod, you look, like, weird," Kelly decided curiously. "Is that like, a cool tried I should try? Who made your shirt?"

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

"A seamstress?" Mat replied, looking down at it. He couldn't even remember which country he'd bought it in. "I'm certain you'd look good in it, though."

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

Kelly giggled, grinning at him. "Omigod, like, that would be so huge on me!"

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

He winked back at her. "I think you'd be lovely. We should try it some time."

[yakkoyaks.livejournal.com]

Yakko ran into the common room and suddenly stopped.

"It's that time again!" After a brief pause, he continued, as if addressing someone who wasn't there. "No, it's time to learn the day's lesson! And to find out what it is, we turn to... The Wheel of Morality!" Yakko motioned towards the door, where a large wheel with 'The Wheel of Morality' written on it in huge letters drifted in.

"Wheel of Morality, turn, turn, turn," Yakko recited as he spun the wheel. "Tell us the lesson that we should learn." As the spinning wheel slowed down and landed on the number 6, a sheet of paper was printed from a slot on the side. Yakko went to his next line as he grabbed the sheet of paper. "Moral Number Six. And the moral of today's story is... It's the squeaky wheel that gets the grease. Unless, of course, it means the wheel is way too old and it gets replaced by a new wheel."

Yakko shrugged, darted out of the room, and the wheel disappeared out into the hallway a moment later.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Oh my god, what?" Kelly asked approximately forty seconds later, totally missing everything about the wheel of morality and all it entailed. "I was like, really into hearing about Britney Spears."

[bloody-luck.livejournal.com]

"Burn me, what was that?" Mat asked.

If it was a bubble of evil manifesting itself, it wasn't his fault.

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"...Who are Brad and Angelina?" Jennifer asked, entering the common room.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, omigod. They are like, adorable, but they have like sixty-four babies," Kelly told her.

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"That's a lot of babies," Jennifer said. "She must not get out much."

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"I know, right! And they don't even look like them."

Give her a minute. The adoption thing'll occur to her.

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"...you don't think she's cheating on him, do you?" Jennifer said, going the gossipy route.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod I hope not! He's Brad Pitt!" she said, eyes wide. "That would be like, beyond terrible. Like the worst thing ever. Like, literally, nothing worse could happen. Omigod. I would be devastated."

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"Well, what if he cheated. Wouldn't that be worse?" Jennifer said.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod. I mean, she's too pretty. But he could totally cheat on her with me and I'd be okay with that," she decided. "He's like, old, but soooooo cute!"

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"That seems a little... double-standard-y," Jennifer said.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Well, I don't want to have sex with her," Kelly said logically. Kelly didn't understand double standards.

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"So it's okay for him to cheat because it means you might have a chance?" Jennifer said.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod, totally. Brad Pitt is like, the hottest hot guy," she said, nodding.

[not-jaded-yet.livejournal.com]

"Really?" Jennifer said. "But if he's got tons of kids, shouldn't he be a little old for you?"

[officetightass]

Angela stood at the entry to the common room, looking as irritated as she possibly could, starting off with, "Do you mind? You can be heard all the way downstairs."

Actually, probably not, but far be it from Angela not to take the opportunity to nitpick.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Omigod come look at this guy!" Kelly squealed at her, ignoring that and pointing at the screen as she giggled. "Why does he like, hate all these singers? And you can see, like, his nipples through his shirt, it's so tight!"

[officetightass]

Oh, gross. "No," she said, folding her arms over her chest just at the mention of that word. "I don't need to see that."

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Like, why would he dress like that?" Kelly wondered. "Is it because he's British? Like, I think I've seen British people before and like, they don't all dress like that. Like, that would be bad, 'cause some of them are like, old and not hot at all, and no one wants to see that. Ewww. Like, what if Benjamin Franklin had dressed like that?"

First of all, Kelly needed to learn history.

[officetightass]

"Benjamin Franklin couldn't have dressed like that. Those 'fashions,'" which was said like it should have been involved in air quotes, but air quotes were tacky so no, "weren't invented yet."

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"That you know of," Kelly said wisely. "Who knows what they wore underneath! You should look that up, like, in the library." Because that was going to happen.

[officetightass]

"I have better things to do with my time," Angela said immediately. Really? Seriously.

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Like what?" Kelly asked curiously.

[officetightass]

"Absolutely anything else."

You expected specifics?

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Well, yeah, sex and doing my hair would be like a million times more fun. But not at the same time. I'm not like, that talented, 'cause like, I need my hands for both!"

[officetightass]

Angela pursed her lips, trying to will away that mental image. She really didn't need that today. Or any day.

"What was your name?"

[italksmack.livejournal.com]

"Kelly, omigod. What's yours?" she asked eagerly.

[officetightass]

"Angela." Not that she'd care past tomorrow.

All Angela cared about was that she had a name now to go with the complaints she would undoubtedly have to file.