fandomhighdorms | 5th Floor Common Room, Saturday Morning

Kathy was a zombie this morning.

No, really. After staying out far too late in Baltimore last night, she'd come home with the sun well on its way to being up and flopped down on her bed to catch a few blissful hours of sleep. But apparently something had taken her 'few' at face value and decided that a few was all she needed before being woken up by a phone call informing her that she had a kid.

With Ezra.

Oh god.

A weekend of childcare was not something she could deal as sleep deprived as she was, so after a trip downstairs to make sure she hadn't just dreamed that whole conversation, she'd come back up here to try to make herself functional. Which meant coffee. So much coffee. Ridiculous amounts of coffee to be consumed as quickly as possible. And then also food, because she was starving and there were kids and they'd probably be starving and at least Fandom had had the decency to stock the fridge before inflicting small people on the island?

With a second pot of coffee brewing (she hadn't been kidding about needing her caffeine, okay?), Kathy set to work making a decent amount of breakfast for anyone who'd be interested. Omelettes with various kinds of filling, bacon, and toast would make for a decent breakfast for kids, right? And some hoddeok for dessert because she needed some delicious comfort food that reminded her of home right now.

Home, where she didn't have children.

[Open to kids and students!]

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Kathy didn't need to actually say anything. Not when she could just put a hoddeok on her plate and cut into it. The melted sugar oozed out on the plate, wafting the scent of cinnamon in the air.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" she asked.

Tebb's stomach growled. "Fine, I'll have your stoopa omelette."

"You're too kind," Kathy drawled, getting up to make him one. "What do you want in it. We've got a ton of stuff here--all sorts of veggies and cheese."

You were going to have a healthy breakfast and you were going to like it, kid.

Tebb's nose was already wrinkling at the idea of vegetables.

"Cheese. And meat. All the meat."

Mmm. Healthy.

"Fine, but then you're getting juice, too."

Cheese, meat, and eggs still beat just plain sugar. Kathy could handle the compromise.

Three eggs, a bunch of bacon and a handful of cheddar cheese made for a pretty quick omelette, so it was only a few minutes later that she was plating it for him and handing it over. "You eat that and I'll make you a haddeok or two, okay?"

"'kay," Tebb said between bites.

"Better than the donuts earlier," he said.

"I'm glad," Kathy said, pouring him some juice and handing it over. "You should have a good breakfast, it's important for the rest of your day. And if you're still hungry after you're done with what I've given you, I'll make more, okay?"

Turning back to fry up his haddeok, she asked, "So who's son are you? You're not calling me Mom, so I'm guessing not mine. You need me to find someone for you?"

Tebb rolled his eyes. "Nah. They're too busy yelling to care where I am."

Kathy winced and decided to make him an extra hoddeok. She wanted to reassure him that someone would be around to find him once they stopped fighting, but he was too old to be convinced about something she wasn't even sure was true.

"Then I'm gonna make you something for lunch," Kathy decided. "Just to make sure you don't starve while your parents are being idiots."

She might not have called them that if she'd realized they were teachers. Or maybe she would have called them something worse? Who knows.

"Might be a while," Tebb said with his mouth full.

Kathy thought about some of her classmates and sighed. Fair enough.

"Lunch and maybe money for dinner," she amended.

She was a ridiculous soft touch, god.

"Just promise you'll eat a vegetable today?"

"One," Tebb said. "Like a potato."

"I'll give you extra to add bacon and cheese to your potato if you eat a green and leafy vegetable." Kathy was not above bribing him, no.

"Does it have to be leafy? Can it just be green, like a pepper or a chile?"

Tebb was not about trying to get jalapeno poppers to count as a serving of veggies.

"Don't push your luck, kid, or I'll insist on a side salad."

...She'd be willing to compromise on broccoli bites.

Tebb wrinkled up his nose. "Gross. Fine. One piece of broccoli on a baked potato."

Swimming in fake cheez.

"The normal amount they'd put on, but you only have to eat the tops, not the ones that are the weird, stalky bottom bits."

Dammit, she was going to win an argument with a preteen! She was!

Tebb was quiet for a long moment. Finally: "Whatever."

You've won, Kathy! Mwahahaha.

Kathy resisted the urge to give victory arms. "Thank you," she said, because one of them could afford to be gracious. "And here." She handed over three hoddoek on a plate, and two twenties. "Eat up. I'll make you a few sandwiches for lunch, okay?"

He was getting peanut butter and bananas and he was going to like it. And also some baby carrots as a snack. Kids would eat anything if they got hungry enough.

"'kay," Tebb said. "Then I should probably find the two dumbasses. Not that they're super upset I'm not around..."

And there went Kathy's heart, breaking a little. No kid should feel that way, even if his parents were two idiot, self-absorbed teens.

"You want me to go talk some sense into them?" she offered. "Remind them that it's only for a weekend and they can suck it up and treat you better?"

"Nah," Tebb said. "I'm used to it."

Well that just won for the most heartbreaking thing she'd heard all day. "That--that doesn't make it right," Kathy said softly.

Tebb let his eyes get even wider, then totally blew it by grinning. "Oh, it's not that bad," he giggled, pulling his treats closer in case she decided to take them back because he'd been a little shit.

When your dads were Anakin and Atton, overdramatics was pretty much a given.

Twice in one day she'd been reeled in by a little kid. She needed to take some kind of people-reading seminar.

"I ought to take back the cash and send you home to them," she groused, but made no move to do so. "Little brat."

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