Second Floor Common Room [Sunday Afternoon]

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

Father Ned had decided to go out to be with the people today. Yesterday had been fulfilling and exhausting between all the guidance he'd tried to provide, the last rites he'd given those poor coma patients, and the marriage of those two young children that would be together forever. He just knew it.

He tried not to think about the girl with the enormous chest who'd confessed...something to him. He wasn't sure and she'd run and he was...confused.

It was almost enough to make him forget about his own sordid past. Almost. He'd had nightmares about that again last night. So vivid, so real.

No, he was reformed now. He wouldn't go back to that time, to that place. Now, he was a giver of counsel, a provider of aide.

"Friends," he said to no one in particular, "I welcome you on this glorious day. I'm so glad you all could come out here and reach out to those less fortunate. And, just because you're less fortunate, does not make you any less of a person. You are all beautiful human beings, ready to spread your wings and fly. You must, though, resist temptation. You must resist the evils of the dark paths. Do not go gently into that good night. Follow the light and you will shine like the sun. Follow your heart and it will lead you to the meadow of utopia. Follow the dark path and purgatory will welcome you with open arms. You will be unable to leave. You will be forgotten. Because, dear friends, if you go down this path, you will only certainly end up in a clinic, in a coma, with half your face done and friends, I do not want to watch you all die of comas. It is a sad thing. Comas are SAD. Say no to comas. Thank you."

With that Father Ned took a seat with his book and hoped his message had gotten through.

[Ned's still around after his "sermon" so feel free to talk to him!]

Comments

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"Well, forever or at least until the divorce is final," John felt that was an important caveat. "As a man of the cloth, my fiancee and I were hoping you would do the honors of presiding over the service."

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

"I would be honored," Ned said, delighted by the offer. "A marriage ceremony is one of my most favorite parts of being a man of the cloth. I enjoy watching two young souls unite in a union that makes them bond to each other. That you can guide each other and keep each other on the path of righteousness is truly a blessing. Fear not people who may try and guide you off this path. If that happens, you must fight back. Fight back with all you have."

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"Oh, you know I'll fight," John promised, making a fist and directing his speech to the ceiling. "I'll fight that scarf-stealing, girl-bathing suit-wearing, poncy bastard Charles Bass with every fiber of my being until the day I die!"

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

"Does Charles Bass wish to marry your beloved as well?" Ned asked. "Comas can stop that."

What, Father Ned?

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"Charles Bass wishes to steal my life," John spat on the ground. "Wait, comas? Really?" This was an interesting idea.

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

"Is this Charles Bass not a man of the Lord?" Ned asked, frowning. "And yes, comas are a very convenient way of not eliminating someone but still disposing of them. God...is all right with this."

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"No, he's a terrible heathen," John lied. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind, Father. And thank you for agreeing to marry Jaina and me. We'll be sure to compensate you appropriately."

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

"Compensation is not needed," Ned said, shaking his head. "The only compensation for me comes from seeing you both happy and not in comas. So many comas. I do hope they find a cure for those comas. Having to tell people they're not going to make it is heartbreaking."

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"No compensation?" John was surprised. Everyone wanted something. "How about we set up a fund through the diamond mine that proceeds coma research? It seems to be a passion of yours."

[death-and-pies.livejournal.com]

"That would be most welcome," Ned decided. "Comas are a passion of mine. They seem to take so many and no one knows how to stop them. I just wish all of God's children could avoid the almost eternal sleep. Comas. I would fight them myself with a sword if they were tangible."