fandomhighdorms | Third Floor Common Room, Early Tuesday Evening

Sokka wasn't all that quick on the uptake today. "Hey, Rikku, what's up?" he asked, as he walked into the room. He started humming along with her and crushed a snowman under his foot.

"Koniichiwa!" Rubii announced, posing dramatically. "Have you come to help me? In my fight against evil?!"

"Hyperforce therapy spa kiss!" She made a few swirling motions with her arms and pushed out, looking at the snowmen expectedly. As if she had just sent a huge, epic energy wave of some variety, and they were gonna blow up.

Any second now.

Sokka blinked at her. "The what now? I mean, yeah, I fight evil, but..."

Rubii perked up. "We need to reveal -- your true form!"

She held up her hand, showing off a plastic ring that looked like it came from a gumball machine. "Behold, the Force Ruby of Mystic Powerness," she intoned solemnly. "It will show us ... your hidden power!"

Rubii then waved her hand around in the air and started singing the theme song. It didn't have any words, but there were lots of nice dance moves for flourishes on the "DAH! DAH!"s. There were also fancy hand movements around Sokka as if he were undergoing a seriously amazing transformation in a dramatic sort of cutscene.

After twenty or thirty seconds of this, she stopped abruptly and grinned at him. "Wai wai!" she announced. "You are Tailed-Pony Wolf-Fighter! You are here to help me! Arigato!"

Edited 2008-12-16 23:45 (UTC)

Sokka struck a magnificent pose. "I am here to help your arrigotto!"

Then he shrugged. "Are you having me on, Orangey, or has Fandom made you insane?"

"Shhhh!" Rubii said, eyes wide. "None must know my secret! Only you, Tailed-Pony Wolf-Fighter, who walks the path with me! We fight evil, ne ka? And the Lightbringer-Giver!"

Petey mrowled at Sokka unhappily. He had a cape. He wasn't allowed to eat it, either. He had the feeling something was Very Wrong with Mommy.

Sokka looked at Petey, and realized that, for whatever reason, Rikku was currently dumber than her cat. So he started chuckling.

"Yes! Yes, I am! I am Ponytail Wolf Fighter Man, and I will help you! But first, I need to return to my Fortress of Solitude to fetch my... Ne ka evil-fighting box!"

A.K.A. his camera.

"Be right back!"

"Hurry!" she called after him. "Evil lies behind every door! Travel safely, Tailed-Pony Wolf-Fighter! I will hold the forces at bay here! Yoshaaaaa!"

Another energy ball at the snowmen. Damn, the snowmen were hard to kill with imaginary energy balls.

Petey huffed. So much for anyone rescuing him.

Ponytail Sparklewolf made a little explosion noise with his mouth and knocked over some of the snowmen as he rushed by. It couldn't hurt, could it?

He hurried back with his camera and started filming Rikku. "Quick! For great justice! Tell me your name and your mission!"

"Rubii ... Saikikku ... Princess ... Spiral!" Rubii intoned, at full volume, and with a dramatic pose for each. "I wield the Force Ruby of Mystic Powerness! It has revealed ... my true form!"

Was he hoping to get footage of the theme song? Because she was singing it again. With the fancy hand movements and everything.

Ohhhhhhh, yes, he was. He let it go on for a bit, because this was good shit, right here. "Look, Ruby!" he eventually interrupted, pointing. "Evil snowmen!"

Rubii gasped. "They are no match for me! Dancing Little-Toe Bento Starlight!"

This particular ball of energy was totally going to smash up all of those snowmen. Seriously. After all, it took her long enough to cast it.

Sokka rushed over and knocked them down, then clapped. "Awesome, Princess Ruby!" he declared. "You are truly a magnificent superhero!"

"No," Rubii said, blushing fiercely. "I am but one girl, helping to stand against evil. It is the Force Ruby of Mystic Powerness that has given me the strength, and the Lightbringer-Giver who has shown me the way."

This meant she had to scoop up Petey and do his theme song for a while.

It sounded suspiciously like hers.

The show must have cheap production values.

Sokka chuckled again and eyed Cuban Pete. "And just how would you characterize the intelligence of the Light Bringer?" he asked. Because, seriously, that cat was dumb as a brick.

Okay. So. Today had been an... Interesting day. What with the thing that had happened in that place and all. Reno was still musing on the aforementioned thing as he made his way up the stairs of the dorms so he could head into his room and start researching things from home.

Weird week.

The week was about to get far, far weirder when, on a whim, he followed the weird sounds coming from the Third Floor common room. Some things, after all, were important to investigate in this kind of place. Fandom was weird.

...

"Oh. My. Shit."

[This thread is going to be last, chronologically. Just noting that, in case someone wants to pop in and gawk at Princess Rubii before Reno drags her to safety.]

Rubii turned, dramatically, and swooned. One hand up to her forehead, full dramatics.

"It's you!" she cried. "Oh! I knew that you would come to my rescue!"

Her eyelashes were fluttering in what she may have assumed was a coy manner. It looked somewhat more like she was having a mild seizure.

(Yes, please! RUBII HAS NOT SUFFERED ENOUGH YET.)

Very ... erm. Dramatic, indeed.

"Your rescue?" Reno was going to just sort of stand there and gape for a moment while he took in this scene. An untrained individual might misconstrue this moment as 'gawking.'

They would be correct.

"You in some kinda danger?" Reno was suspecting LSD. "What the hell did you do to Petey?"

"I have been ... transformed!" Rubii announced. "I have discovered my true form! The Lightbringer-Giver showed me the way! Here! Let me show you! Let me show you his true form!"

Rubii scooped up the Lightbringer-Giver and waved him around in the air while she sang her transformative theme song. There were awesome dance moves. More or less.

At the end of it, she set the Lightbringer-Giver down on the back of his couch. "Asoko!" she said. "By the power of the Force Ruby of Mystic Powerness, he is ... the Lightbringer-Giver!"

Petey mrowled unhappily at Reno. Mommy had lost her flippin' mind.

"I'm... quiverin' in my boots," Reno noted. And it would be a very dry sort of statement, if not for the fact that he was sincerely worried about his girlfriend's sanity, at this point.

"He. Uh. Has a nice cape, there?"

Reno made his way toward the couch. Slowly. Carefully. With rescuing Petey in mind.

No sudden moves.

"You should be!" Rubii declared happily. "For I am fighting evil in all its forms. These evil-doers and no-good snowmen stand no chance against ... Rubii Saikikku Princess Spiral!"

She was starting to sing the damn song again. She stopped abruptly, a few seconds in, and put both hands over her head.

"Cutie Butterfly Spira Keisatsu!" she announced, balling up an invisible wad of energy and flinging it towards the snowmen. Who were totally gonna blow up, in a few seconds here.

Petey looked up at Reno expectantly. Hey! Hey, he knew him! And he wasn't batshit crazy! Help?

Inching. Towards. The cat.

Reno scooped poor Pete up into his arms and stared at Rikku for a moment more. And then gave his head a shake.

"Okay, Ruby Psychic Princess Spiral," he grunted, reaching out with one foot to idly punt one of the snowmen over. "Looks like your work here is done. Time for a tactical retreat to the ratcave, where Bitterwoman and the Flyin' Spaghetti Monster await to give us our next mission."

Poor Petey.

Petey wriggled happily into Reno's arms. Save him? Please? She was crazy and he had pipe cleaners over his eyes.

"I can't quit now," Rubii huffed. "Evil still lurks in the hearts of men. And snowmen. You are trying to stop me! Dress-suit eyemask-chan! I trusted you! But I ... I will fight you!"

She would, too. It would probably involve more messed-up names and invisible energy attacks.

"You're gonna have to catch me first," Reno said, in a very-flat-but-pretending-to-be-melodramatic sort of way. "I have the... Lightbringer... Giver thing. And I'm going to take him back to my... Uh."

This was so messed up.

"Secret lair."

Room 429. Secret lair. Same difference.

Edited 2008-12-17 02:02 (UTC)

"Nani?" Rubii gasped. "You ... baka! I trusted you, dress-suit-eyemask-chan! Yarou! Dani! I will defeat you!"

She drew herself up to her full height and pulled her upside-down sunglasses off her head. "Dark-vision Sugoi Ruby Danger Angel!"

She hurled the sunglasses right at his chest.

He was asking for it.

Reno blinked at the glasses, watching them bounce harmlessly to the floor.

"At least you ain't wearin' 'em upside-down anymore," he mused, and then shook his head. "Little do you realize, I'm immune to your Dark-vision sugar rubies. You're gonna have to just track me all the way back to my hideout."

His room. He was already turning on his heel to head there.

He figured she'd follow. He had her poor, poor cat.

"You are dangerous, indeed," she seethed, following him out of the common room and up the stairs. And throwing imaginary energy balls at his head. "But I will not be stopped! I will not rest until the Lightbringer-Giver is returned to my care! You cannot overpower the Mystic Force Ruby of Force Mystic ..."

Rubii frowned. "Mystic ... Force ... Ruby of ... of Mystic Force of ..."

One hand reached for the railing, because suddenly, Rubii was teetering. Railing. Good. "I feel kinda ..."

Reno stopped in his tracks and glanced over his shoulder.

"Kinda...?"

If the answer was anything to do with mystic sparkle feather ponies, he was going to have to drag her to his room.

"Reno?" she said, squinting up at him. "What'd you ... do to Petey?"

Wow, she felt dizzy all of a sudden. And like she was having the trippiest dream ever.

Edited 2008-12-17 03:01 (UTC)

"Oh, thank Shiva," Reno sighed under his breath as he backtracked to give Rikku a hand. "Wasn't me, Sunshine. Either Lightbringer-Giver here did it all to himself, or it was you, yoto."

A pause.

"Nice skirt, by the way. You're gonna have to wear one more often."

Rikku stared at him. Bits were coming back to her.

"Oh, noooooooooo," she moaned. "This isn't real. Bad dream. Gonna wake up in a second."

Petey mrowled at her, from the safe haven of Reno's arms. Hey! She sounded less crazy! Hi! ... Could he take the cape off, now?

Edited 2008-12-17 03:10 (UTC)

Reno was wearing the sort of smug grin that was found primarily in cocky bastards and boys whose girlfriends were coming back to their senses.

"You can wake up in my room, yoto. We'll pull out your change of clothes, and that way you don't gotta worry about Ella walkin' in while you're still dressed like Princess Ruby of the Psychic Wombats."

"Princes ... Rubii Saikikka ... something," Rikku managed. She had vague memories of there being a theme song, and a sneaking suspicion that someone might have taped it. "What happened? I ..."

Blink. Blink. Blink.

"I got bit," she said weakly. "I didn't see what it was. It must've been ..."

Wow. Poison would've been much nicer.

"Bit, huh? Gremlin? Shitty deal." Reno put his arm around her shoulder and started her up the stairs again. It was safer up the stairs, on the fourth floor, behind a closed door. "Anything I can get you? Glass of water? Shot of whiskey?"

Somehow, this seemed like a whiskey moment.

"Paper bag to go over my head?" Rikku asked. "I don't think Petey's ever going to speak to me again."

You could see how upset he was. He kept trying to eat the tiara, after all. Traumatized.

"Maybe some of that whiskey. Uh. Just a little. No getting drunk tonight. If I embarrass the crap out of myself horribly again today, I'm just not getting out of bed tomorrow."

Momoko heard noises from the common room and wondered what was going on. It took her a few seconds of watching Rikku move around the snowmen, but her crazy fangirl brain finally recognized the flouncing and the hand movements and came up with the only possible answer. She pointed and squealed.

"Ah! Magical Girl Pretty Rikku?"

"Wai wai!" Rubii said excitedly, bouncing and waving to her little sib. "It is I! Rubii Saikikku Princess Spiral! I have come to defeat the evil! With my Force Ruby of Mystic Powerness!"

This required flashing her very fabulous ruby ring (the one that she had gotten from a gumball machine) and singing the theme song, waving her hands around to indicate the super-sparkly transition.

Momoko could SO play this game. It was, after all, how she got her reputation!

"Ahah! That's a great transformation song!" She clapped and moved further into the room. She stood, legs planted firmly apart, and let her hands fly from her sides to form a triangle in the air in front of her. "For the miracle of Love and Justice, I transform to fight!" She made a wooshing sound and spun in a circle, then gave a thumbs up. "I am Miracle Ace Ranger! I've come to aid the fabulous Rubii Saikikku Princess Spiral in her quest."

"Oh! Honto ni?!" Rubii clapped her hands with glee. "You are to help me! The Lightbringer-Giver has brought you to me! Saiko shibui! We shall be ... partners, in fighting the evil snowmen!"

This called for a special, celebratory round of the theme song. Today was awesome.

"Hai hai!" ~~Momoko~~ Miracle Ace Ranger replied with a raised hand! "Lightbringer-Giver-san has sent me to you!"

She dropped her hand to her forehead and shifted her feet to stand at attention. "The snowmen are a terrible danger to the miracle of Love..."

she made fists and crossed her hands at the wrist, holding them in front of her heart... "and Justice!"

she nodded, then threw her crossed hands above her head and broke them apart. "and it is my sacred duty to stop them..."

her left hand was now on her hip and her right was pointing into the distance "and to maintain the sunrise, Princess, we must defeat them!"

Whoa. Miracle Ace Ranger had way-awesome moves. Her show must have much better choreographers.

"For Love! For Justice! For magical girls and rubiis and the Lightbringer-Giver!" Rubii was trying her own dramatic moves, but it looked sort of like a slow-motion version of the Macarena. "We will destroy the snowmen! We have no mercy! Combined, we are ... unstoppable!"

Well, really! Give Princess Rubii a few seasons; this is only her premiere episode!

"Combined, ~~the ratings are going to skyrocket~~ our pure and true hearts will lead us to victory over evil!"

Miracle Ace Ranger turned to find a non-melting snowman and point at it. "Snowman! Your evil is obvious since you do not melt like normal snowmen! Prepare yourself for your Justice end!" She again formed her fingers into a triangle in front of her. "Magical Love Force Tri-attack beam!! Pischewbweeeeeeeeeeem! sparkles! boom!"

Rubii waved her arms around to conjure up yet another invisible energy ball to fling at them.

"They are no match for us! Their non-melting snow will not protect them from the full-powered attack of ..."

Hmm. She needed a good name for them.

"Rubii-Ace Moonpower Joint Heart-friends Squad!"

Rubii should not be allowed to name things.

Edited 2008-12-17 04:48 (UTC)

"Wai!! That's a really good name!" Momoko squee-ed, out of character a moment, then she smiled and gave a thumbs up to her fellow Rubii-Ace Moonpower Joint Heart-friends Squad member. "That's right, Princess Rubii! Full power for Justice, Love and the honour of Lightbringer-giver-san!!"

Miracle Ace Ranger turned and again formed her triangle. "Pischewbweeeeeeeeeeem - - uuuuuuuuuuuungung! OH NO!" She suddenly shrank back. "My Magical Love Force Tri-attack beam is being reflected? Be careful Princess!" Her hands swished around the room, indicating the path of a bouncing beam that would hopefully not injure the Princess...

"Nani!?" Rubii held her hands up defensively, then got nailed in the face with the magic energy beam of doom. She fell to the ground very, very dramatically. "Nooo!" she gasped. "Miracle Ace Ranger! My ... my Force Ruby has been sealed! You must save us both!"

Miracle Ace Ranger struck a dramatic Pose of Shock (!!) and ran to stand by her fallen comrade and protect her from the obviously growing more powerful snowmen. "No! Princess Rubii! You must awaken! My powers alone aren't enough. Oh, if only we had combined to perform our master move, the Mega Rubii-Ace Moonpower Joint Heart-friends Squad Force of Gems attack! That surely would have worked!" Dropping her head in sorrow, she again crossed her arms at the wrists and placed them against her heart. "If only somehow someone could save my dear friend Rubii."

If snowmen could sweatdrop...

Third Floor Common Room, Early Tuesday Evening

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