The Deck, Wednesday Morning

[living_endless]

It was a nice morning, with the first hint of fall in the still-warm air. Didi carried a mug of tea onto the deck to enjoy it, feeling philosophical. If she counted the time in New York with Sexton, her first anniversary as a human would be Friday. She wondered if she should throw herself a party to mark the milestone -- if she was still around at all. The feeling she wouldn't be kept tugging at her. Mortal life felt like a dress she had almost outgrown, a sentimental favorite she'd need to give up on soon enough.

She tried to shake it off as she sipped her drink. Going or staying -- whichever was going to happen, would happen without her worrying about it. For now, there was slightly spicy tea to drink and a blue sky to watch.

[OOC: Last public post as Didi.]

Comments

[living_endless]

"There's Drake," Didi answered, chewing a fingernail. "He might be sending me all wonky, maybe. That's a smart idea."

[trigons_child]

"The professor who is a demon," Raven said, nodding. "I do not know him. I did not take any of his classes, but I have heard him on the radio. Or perhaps your weird feeling is because another of your siblings is soon to arrive? The new students will be here soon, will they not?"

[living_endless]

"I like him," Didi said simply, considering the other thing. "Or it could be that. Destruction would be a good teacher, and Daniel -- Dream -- didn't get to grow up. I wouldn't mind either of them. I didn't get a vibe about Del, but she's ... Del."

Which explained Delirium about as well as she could manage.

"It's usually interesting when there are three of us in one place."

[trigons_child]

"What do you mean by interesting?" Raven asked. She knew about the Endless from her studies in Azarath, but the information contained in the library there was far from vast.

[living_endless]

"Not in any way that would hurt the island," Didi answered. "But imagine that Death and Desire and Dream are all in one room, and they all have the same love and resentment between them any siblings are going to have, and they've had a couple million years for things to build up." She paused for a moment, letting that mental image sink in.

"We don't have that many family meetings. Last one was when our brother died."

[trigons_child]

"I have no siblings," Raven said, as continuity rolled its eyes. "I have never experienced that type of bond, so I do not quite understand it. You have rivalries between you? Do you feel closer to some than others?" She smiled softly and shook her head. "I am sorry, I do not mean to ask such personal questions. I am merely curious."

[living_endless]

"I don't mind," Didi reassured her. "I like talking about them. The official answer has to be I love them all, right?" She wasn't going to play favorites in front of a mortal.

"But, like, Desire and Dream didn't get along for eons, and Destruction used to watch out for Despair and Delirium. There are politics of everything. Even of us."

[trigons_child]

"I do not think I would like Despair," Raven said, wrinkling her nose. She quickly added, "I should not say that about your sibling. But despair, the emotion despair, is one I always seek to help others defeat."

[living_endless]

"She's ..." Didi hesitated. The naked, squat Endless tended to be the hardest for people outside the family to appreciate. "She didn't choose to be who she is," she finally said. "And she has to exist. Without her, no one would know joy. You have to have contrasts."

She considered it a second, and added something. "I have a favor to ask. Something about Jono."

Speaking of despair.

[trigons_child]

"I suppose to truly appreciate joy, you must know what sadness feels like," Raven said, nodding.

"What about Jono? Is something wrong?"

[living_endless]

"No," Didi said, because nothing was wrong. "But ... watch him if I go away. That's all."

She didn't think he'd let Raven take away his pain, but having someone to talk to would help. She ignored the pang of jealousy.

[trigons_child]

"If you go away?" Raven repeated, puzzled. "You are not leaving Fandom, are you? You have not graduated yet." Because clearly no one could leave unless they finished school.

She felt the pang but was not sure what to make of it, and said nothing. Didi was always hard for her to read by the very nature of what she was, and she was never certain if she was sensing her feelings accurately.

[living_endless]

"Not yet," Didi agreed. "I have another year. But ... I think my warranty as a human might be about up." She shrugged. "I already got 360-odd days more than I was supposed to."

[trigons_child]

Raven had to pause a moment to let that sink in. "No," she said, shaking her head. "That cannot be true -- you cannot be forced to leave."

[living_endless]

"There's only one way to stop living a human life," Didi answered. "And I don't get a choice about that, any more than anybody else."

She knew this was not strictly true, but that was okay. It was the spirit of the point she was going for.

[trigons_child]

"If you are injured, I will heal you," Raven protested, still trying to deny it. "We will not let you go so easily." Even as she said it, she knew it wasn't true. But though he couldn't heal death, she could fight it.

[living_endless]

"You'd risk the universe to keep one girl around a little longer?" Didi asked, looking alarmed. "Raven, I'm flattered, but let it go. Please."

[trigons_child]

"I cannot simply watch you die," Raven said, blinking back tears. "Jono -- all your friends -- will be devastated. We care for you so much."

[living_endless]

Didi's answer, when it came, was small and very young. "Please don't make this harder than it has to be."

[trigons_child]

"I am sorry," Raven said, wiping a hand across her eyes. "I just do not wish to see you go. You are my friend."

[living_endless]

"We'll see each other again," Didi said. "The universe isn't that big, and you're my friend, too. I promise."

[trigons_child]

"Good," Raven murmured. She took a moment to collect her feelings, not wanting her own distress to sadden Didi, but she had to ask, "Does Jono know?"

[living_endless]

"I haven't seen him today," Didi admitted. "I ... would you want to hear it, if you were him? I'm not going to just vanish, but I wonder if there's another way."

[trigons_child]

"I think I would want to know," Raven said quietly, though not with much certainty. She tried to remember what it had been like when Azar died, and how she had not been allowed to grieve for her. "I would wish to say goodbye."

[living_endless]

"He deserves that much," Didi had to admit, biting her lip. "Thanks, Raven."