Second floor common room [morning]

[momslilassassin]

Ben hadn't exactly been getting a lot of sleep these days, so he finally gave up on trying and wandered into the common room barefoot in search of coffee and something other than the list of Fandom students and alumni who hadn't made it back to the island by yesterday evening to keep his mind busy.

He flipped the television on...and found that it was showing a gremlin-bite tape of his father and Gavin Kriffing Darklighter thinking they were gay German magicians.

"Poor Artoo," Ben murmured, a small smile playing across his lips.

This was certainly distracting, but Ben might not be so pleased the next time a Skywalker gremlin bite came onto the screen.

Comments

[momslilassassin]

"Meet an alternate version of my dad," Ben said a little wryly. "He's the blond one."

[lockestheway]

"The one with the terrible accent?" Peter asked. After a beat, "...One of the ones with the terrible accent."

[momslilassassin]

"The shorter one with the terrible accent," Ben agreed. "He doesn't normally talk like that."

[lockestheway]

"What are they doing to that robot?" he wondered.

It was an honest question!

[momslilassassin]

"Really ticking it off," Ben said with a tiny smile. "I think they think it's a tiger. Don't ask me why. Gremlin bites are weird."

[lockestheway]

Peter had a brief, almost-hysteric flash of what might happen if he ever got bitten by one of these gremlins in public.

That would be so hard to spin.

"Well, you have to give it to Fandom," he said aloud, "The island sure knows how to boost our spirits in such dark days."

[momslilassassin]

"As long as it doesn't play any of my greatest hits, I'm okay with it," Ben said.

[lockestheway]

"I didn't realise you had greatest hits," Peter mused. "Anything you want to share with the class?"

Don't answer that.

[momslilassassin]

Ben snorted. "If the class includes you, not even a little bit, Wiggin."

[lockestheway]

"In that case, I think I'll stick around," Peter said, "Wouldn't want to miss the show."

Also it would keep him from his increasing urge to run back to his room and stay there.

[momslilassassin]

"I had a feeling you'd say that," Ben said, kicking his feet up onto a table. "Heard about Val," he added softly.

[lockestheway]

"Yeah, well," Peter said, training his eyes on the TV, "You win some, you lose some."

That only barely made sense.

[momslilassassin]

"So I've been told," Ben said, carefully avoiding apologies or expressions of sympathy. It didn't make him feel any better to hear it.

"Nice work with the website," he said instead.

[lockestheway]

"Everyone's been talking past each other," Peter said idly. "Seemed pretty logical to set something up - keep score."

[momslilassassin]

Ben nodded. "It does. Especially since we haven't found anything useful yet--we could've been looking in the same places inadvertently."

[lockestheway]

"And from what I've been seeing, most people are tackling the magic angle," Peter added. "There can only be so many avenues of magic, right?"

[momslilassassin]

"Right," Ben agreed. "Auditors don't sound that magical to me anyway."

[lockestheway]

"Well, sadly there isn't a government on this rock who recognises these guys," Peter said. "Would've been easier if this was just all about paying off back taxes. I could've gotten us a deal."

[momslilassassin]

"Who would we even send the money too?" Ben wondered.

[lockestheway]

"Dear auditing agency in the sky," Peter said, spreading his arms, "Please accept our back taxes with all due apologies and stop eating our worlds, pretty please, signed, everybody ever."

[momslilassassin]

"Maybe they'd take Portalocity drink vouchers," Ben mused.

[lockestheway]

"Oh, now there's a stellar solution!" Peter called.

Sorry, Ben. Sometimes he got a little dramatic.

"Let's get the tax collectors drunk!"

[momslilassassin]

"All of them everywhere," Ben said. "Cover the bases."

[lockestheway]

"So what you're saying is I should hire a campaign bus with its own bar?"

[momslilassassin]

"Works for me," Ben said. "Assuming we can leave here. Has anyone checked the causeway?"