Second floor common room, all Friday afternoon

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The kitchenette counters in the common room were covered in all sorts of unusual things this afternoon: bowls, spoons, cheese graters, half a lobster, bits of lego. A cheery tuneless song with lyrics written entirely in gibberish came from behind the counter as someone rummaged through the fridge. Finally, the door shut, and a slightly deranged looking Hamlet stood up, wearing a quickly assembled version of the Swedish Chef's outfit.

As he continued singing and rummaging through the cupboards for things, he stood up a large sign against the counter:




Brunch cooked while you wait!
The chef will try his best to cook whatever you want!
Børk! Børk! Børk!


Moral of the day: don't eat strange cupcakes that are lying out in the open. They do weird things to your head.


[OOC: So very open.]

Comments

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The Danish Chef looked up from where he was cleaning his cakenschmooscher at the sound of cushions being thrown around. He smiled politely at his fellow cupcake-eating insanity victim the man with the very attractive mustache.

"Vell hellu zeere-a! Ere-a yuoo here-a fur zee broonch tuu? Bork Bork Bork!"

[anextimeagent.livejournal.com]

Whether it was the proximity of food, the inherent power in one who wielded the antidote to low blood sugar or some weird cupcake related synchronicity Robert Goulet heard the chef.

He frowned in puzzlement even as he looked at him warily, absently dumping a half-empty cup of coffee over the TV Guide and pulling the batteries out of the remote controls and stuffing them down the back of the couch.

It was three o'clock. How could it be brunch?

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The Danish Chef didn't really mind the mess all that much. It wasn't like he was making an effort to be clean himself. Since the mysterious mustachioed man hadn't requested any food yet, he decided to offer some of what he'd already made.

"Iff yuoo're-a ookey veet lefftufers, ve-a hefe-a sume-a jepunese-a ceke-a, bursht, und mooffffeens thet yuoo cuoold hefe-a. Bork Bork Bork!"

He pulled them out of the fridge and put them on the counter. Mmmm, didn't they look smooshed delicious.

[anextimeagent.livejournal.com]

Nooo! Food! Bane of the three o'clock drowsies!

Robert Goulet backed away, never taking his eyes off the strange man who knew his secret weakness, arm upraised to ward off the sight of it.

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The Danish Chef looked a little hurt. The handsome devil with the totally real mustache didn't like his food? Aww, and he'd worked so very hard on it too.

He pulled out his bat from underneath the table. "Du yuoo vunt tu use-a zee cakenschmooscher tu smeshy smeshy?"

[anextimeagent.livejournal.com]

Robert Goulet very much wanted the cakenschmooscher tu smeshy smeshy. Anything that could smeshy smeshy his bane was something Robert Goulet approved of. It could be a secret weapon!

He would be UNSTOPPABLE!!

Striving for a nonchalant hip shimmy, he picked up the cakenschmooscher and started eyeing the jepunese-a ceke-a, bursht, and mooffffeens.

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The Danish Chef pointed towards the cake tray. There was enough whipped cream on it to serve next to seven or eight slices of pie.

"Yuoo shuoold heet zee ceke-a. It testes better vhee it's smeshed. Bork Bork Bork!" he said.

"いたいだよ..." whimpered the Japanese cake meekly.

[anextimeagent.livejournal.com]

This? Was stuff messing at it's finest.

Robert Goulet wielded the cakenschmooscher with a will, bringing it down on the cake, sending whip cream spraying everywhere.

He winced when some splashed on him, but apparently it only had power when someone else was eating it! Robert Goulet was pleased, and he started hitting the cake with even more enthusiasm.

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

"やだ、止めろ," moaned the cake once last time, before going quiet while Robert Goulet was hitting it.

The Danish Chef nodded in approval. That was some mighty fine cakenschmoosching he was doing. A chunk of the cake flew off and hit the wall, where the chef deftly caught it on a plate. He offered it up to pornstache Jack.

"Cake-a?"

[anextimeagent.livejournal.com]

It was too much. Clearly this chef had been luring him closer so he could accost him with food! He knew his secret weakness!

Robert Goulet backed away, tossing the cakenschmooscher at the cake, quickly climbing up the wall and across the ceiling, to disappear out of the room.

...or he would have, if he'd actually been Robert Goulet. Instead, he scrabbled at the wall, leapt upwards, and proceeded to fall on his ass.

Deciding that the floor was in fact the ceiling, because he was Robert Goulet and everyone knows Robert Goulet can walk on ceilings, he stealthily crawled away.

[ihatedenmark.livejournal.com]

The Danish Chef shook his head as Jack Goulet scrabbled at the walls and stealthily made his way out of the room. The poor fellow was so hungry that he'd gone mad.

Hamlet wrapped Jack's piece of cake up, and put it in the fridge. He could have that as a snack later.