ext_361323 (
new-to-liirness.livejournal.com) wrote in
fandomhighdorms2008-05-27 03:03 pm
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near the main campfire - tuesday afternoon
He lay in the grass, mostly because he could. It was a little damp since the day seemed to flutter between beautiful and damp, but he didn't much mind. He didn't catch colds too easily (perhaps the one dip in the well had been enough) and water didn't have any kind of adverse effect on him...
And it was nice out. Soothing. Almost as much as the church, it would let him think.
[open!][flying portion NFB for distance from the ground]
And it was nice out. Soothing. Almost as much as the church, it would let him think.
[open!][flying portion NFB for distance from the ground]

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He smiled at her as they lifted another few feet.
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Amber let go of the handle and went to hold over his. She didn't want to be in control, especially when she knew nothing about this flying stuff, at all.
She also wiggled slightly, locking her ankles beneath her.
"Okay, I'm ready for you to go higher."
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"All right," he said quietly before lifting them very slowly a little higher. They were about a story up now.
"Just let me know if you want to go back down and we will."
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"How high do you usually go?"
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"It's all flying."
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Everything lately for her was about taking chances. This was certainly one of them.
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Then he pulled it towards the sky and flew.
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There it was. Flying. Everything fantastic in the world in the rush of air past you and the feel of the world so far away but spread out before you, all yours.
He loved it. He loved it like nothing else. And getting to show it to someone else was one of the best things in this or any world.
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"I could stay up here forever."
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"I feel more... complete up here. More solid. And oddly enough, more free. It's wonderful."
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Amber grew quiet then, simply content to feel, but after awhile she asked him, "Liir? Can I ask you a personal question?"
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"Certainly."
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"If I care about someone, I care about them. Gender is, well, it's secondary. And if there's supposed to be some sort of divider that says one kind of person is someone I'm supposed to be attracted to and this kind isn't, I don't have one. There's nothing more wonderful than feeling that someone cares about me. That's the most important part. At least for me. It's different for everyone."
He considered why she might be curious.
"Having trouble figuring out something like that?"
He asked very carefully since he knew how hard it could be not to know, to feel like you're weird and don't know things you should.
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His answer completely appeased her and actually made her feel good. Why she asked was simply because she was curious and wanted to know how he felt.
"No, not trouble, no. I mean, I suppose it would be different if I was close enough to someone, and don't get me wrong, our friendship means everythin' to me. But... I guess I do have this divider but not in the way you mean. I'll use you for an example and sincerely hope you understand me: I think it would be easy for anyone to fall for you, me included, but I know that you have a boyfriend so I close myself up to a certain degree and will only allow myself to feel so much. Does that make sense? I think I would be that way with anyone who was attached to someone else. It's... proper."
Again she was quiet for a moment.
"Honestly? I don't think I'm thought of in an attractive fashion. I never really have. By girl or boy. I'm just... a friend. If I care about someone, I care about them. Just like you."
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"Oh."
Like a sinking battleship, the various points of view in his head were scrambling around telling him different things, informing him of different priorities; he'd never been good with surprises. It probably had something to do with the fact that he was his own personal committee.
"That makes sense. And I'm... well, I never do understand what anyone might see in me, but I suppose I'm flattered. I'm glad I mean something to you."
The last was the most solid thing he'd said. He liked Amber.
"But you're very pretty, Amber. And more importantly, you're sweet. You genuinely... you care. You're good to be around."
He didn't know how to explain that. But something else sort of slung itself around the corners of his mind and popped right out of his mouth.
"Would it change, then? If Andrew decided to end things?"
Curious. The way you'd ask someone how a mechanism worked or why the sun rose in the morning. Liir didn't really understand how people worked, to be honest, so he asked when he could. Hopefully, someday, he'd actually understand himself.
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Face hot, she stared down at his her hands on his. "Thank you, Liir, but I wasn't fishin' for compliments. More I was just statin' what was, though you have flattered me, greatly, and I feel good because of it."
Ah. And how did she answer his question without making him feel any less awkward than he no doubt already felt?
"I... I wouldn't jeopardize our friendship, Liir, or influence you any by my personal feelin's," she said finally, very quietly.
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"But it sounded as if you had to hear it.
"And I didn't think you'd jeopardize anything. I just wanted to know. That's all."
He wanted to tell her. He wanted to explain. He didn't know if he could or if it would ever make sense to anyone else even if he did. But he knew he'd done wrong and he wanted to fix it.
"I'm terrible at taking compliments," he said slowly. "But maybe if you don't mind me being a bit slow, I'll know what to say back one day that won't make you unhappy."
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She smiled and knew he couldn't see, but maybe he could hear it in her tone. "Well. Now you know. Curious, just like me?"
Again she grew quiet, especially after what he just said. It was... why did he think he made her unhappy? Amber turned her head again to peer back at him, stared at him closely, her brows knitted gently in confusion. "Why would you think you made me unhappy?"
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"You seemed unnerved by something I said just now. Or something I did. I... didn't really learn how to deal with people growing up, so generally I'm guessing when I have to handle something new someone says or does. It's not as if there's anything up here but me and you, so I assumed it was me."
There was a brief smile.
"I'm happy to foist the blame to you, if you like, but I didn't figure that was very gentlemanly."
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"There's not much to me just yet. So I don't see what's so appealing."
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"You haven't upset me. I was afraid I upset you."
She sighed, closed her eyes. "You're an amazin' person, Liir. I've never met anyone like you before. You're kind, gentle, and you've a carin' nature that is very attractive. And..." she grinned more to herself because he couldn't see and because she felt embolded, however slight, to add, "you are very handsome."
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It wouldn't go over well. He knew that well enough.
He blushed instead, and she could probably feel the warmth of his face. Well, it felt like she should. Perhaps she could.
"Oh. Um, thank you."
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