Anakin Skywalker's Excruciatingly Thorough Guide to Sex Ed, Redux [after classes and clubs]

[sith_happened]

As Anakin had mentioned in the handwavy email he had sent to students' email accounts, sometimes unplanned children couldn't be blamed on a portal or Fandom weirdness. And if they had come back twice? Woe be it upon you, John Sheppard.

So he was in the front of his classroom with a series of beyond thorough pamphlets on contraception, abstinence, and pictures of STDs. He also had a truly horrifying collection of educational videos to show.

Anakin had slapped on a sign on the door welcoming people to the seminar:

I AM STILL TOO HOT TO BE A GREAT-GRANDFATHER
And other reasons why children should remain hypothetical for a long, LONG time
(Skywalker presence mandatory)

Trainwrecks, anyone?

Comments

Come in and mingle!

[sith_happened]

There are only so many seats at the back of the class, after all. You'd hate to be in the front for this.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[momslilassassin]

Ben slunk into the back of the classroom and tried not to make eye contact with anyone.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[solo_sword]

Jaina might have to show up, but this was cutting into work time. Therefore she took a seat at the back so she could go over her datapad.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[momslilassassin]

Ben reached into the Force to flick her ear. Brat.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[weetuskenraider]

Oh, look at Tahiri trying to sneak all the way over to the other side of the back of the room.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

John was probably not supposed to sit next to the one who he was helping create half these great-grandchildren in some alternate future, but she looked far too interested in her work for her own good.

"So, hoping to filter out the lecture with work?"

Re: Come in and mingle!

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

Joan thought maybe she could score some brownie points with Anakin by showing up for his lecture.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[weetuskenraider]

Tahiri kind of wondered if she could hide somewhere.

Or just stay near the door.

She had the feeling her head was going to spontaneously combust any second and it was going to be messy. Why inflict that on anyone?

Re: Come in and mingle!

[momslilassassin]

Ben tried to hide himself entirely in his cloak.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[future_sandworm]

He generally did enjoy Anakin's classes, and he had anyway thought that he needed a little more information on contraceptives, so Leto showed up for this completely of his own choice.

That didn't mean he would have objected to any of his children having been born. Well, Hunith possibly, but she did seem to be a very promising girl, and hopefully her other father didn't show up too often.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

"I've heard this lecture, you sure you need me to stay?" John asked, not taking a seat because he wanted to leave, see.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[sith_happened]

"There were three of them this time!" Anakin barked, pointing to a chair. "Sit!"

Re: Come in and mingle!

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

Cal? Was here for the lulz.

Seriously, there was probably nothing that could be shown here that wasn't worse than his own experiences.

Once you were actually in a medical book for your weird reproductive deformity, you tended to be a little jaded toward the technicalities.

Re: Come in and mingle!

[thismaskiwear.livejournal.com]

Oh, you know Katchoo was here for the trainwreckiness of it all.

And sitting up front, even.

Be horrified at the content!

[sith_happened]

Anakin has done his homework. He's covering contraception from more than a dozen different universes and most of the planets he's been to, complete with horrifying stories about when things have gone wrong.

And since this seemed to have no effect from the last time he did this, the stories and the visual aids are even more graphic.

What a great guy.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[momslilassassin]

Ben would NEVER CLOSE HIS EYES AGAIN.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[joan-notjane.livejournal.com]

"I'm never having sex EVER," Joan muttered.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[weetuskenraider]

Those strangled noises, mixed with incoherent growls that were very definitely obscene words in Tusken? Yeah, that'd be Tahiri, who kept revising her opinion of just how much she wanted to die of embarrassment.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[solo_sword]

Jaina was doing her best to keep her attention on her reading. Honestly, she'd been having sex for a while, she was really well-covered on the contraception front, and she knew he had to be amping it up to scare people.

Every once in a while, though, she'd make a face that said that yes, she'd paid attention to that part.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[future_sandworm]

The material presented was clearly biased, but it was still interesting. Leto enjoyed the cultural comparison. However, this did nothing to change his view that Jedi would be better off if they were less concerned with celibacy.

Orgies did wonders for some people.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[missed-the-gate.livejournal.com]

Okay, John would admit Anakin had topped himself with this one. He'd be blinking away those visuals for a few hours at least.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[not-a-mused.livejournal.com]

...okay.

Yup.

Definitely desensitized. It happened when you carried around something just as gross (in Cal's opinion, anyway, and many people before Fandom supported that fact; it even killed his grandfather) below your waist. Cal didn't know whether he should be grateful or depressed. It was a delicate mixture of both.

He couldn't even really be interested in the very varied contraceptive methods, because, he didn't care what happened this weekend, you couldn't beat out pure basic biological fact.

Re: Be horrified at the content!

[thismaskiwear.livejournal.com]

Katchoo watched the whole thing with a slightly bored expression, only occasionally punctuated by an amused snort.

Her lack of freaking out could only be explained away by the fact that she'd lived with Darcy Parker. You wanted some sick crap, that'd be it right there.

Ask detailed questions!

[sith_happened]

Add to the horror!

OOC

[sith_happened]

Up again by request. Come one, come all :)

...not dirty.